Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Randomize
