im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I didn't notice because vodka
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
