you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize