so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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