Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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