I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
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