dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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