but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
