Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Randomize
