The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
