I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize
