They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Randomize
