i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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