But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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