big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
third nipple confirmed
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
