It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize