We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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