well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
she peed on how many people?
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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