I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Randomize
