he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
