you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
