i barfeds in our rink
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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