Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
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