You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
bring money and cleavage
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
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