Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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