she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
