WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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