come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
