Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Randomize
