We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Randomize
