I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
