I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I have already put on my inside pants.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
