god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
birth control should be required to get into college
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
