he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize