Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
