I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
