Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Randomize
