Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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