I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
