so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
