Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
