This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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