I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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