They have a pepper shaker for pot.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
We are two peas in an std pod
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
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