I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
