i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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