I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
