I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
