He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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