i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
